The Present

In the past weeks our class (Ako Ngatahi) were writing a short story about a video titled “The Present”. It was a story about a boy who got a present and it was a puppy. After he discovered that the puppy only had three legs.

Here is the video

“The Present”

W.A.L.T: Write a narrative

Success Criteria

I know I will be successful when….

• The title is suitable for the text.

• The orientation tells who the story is about, and when and where the story happened.
• The complication describes a problem and explains what happened next.
• The resolution explains how the problem was solved.

I was playing video games when my mum came in with a box and put it in front of me. Annoyed, I said “Mum”! Then she said something about “It's a beautiful day outside”. Then the phone rang and she said “Open the present I got for you”. She walked up the stairs with the phone in her hand. I got curious. I started to open it when a little brown puppy with a big black nose popped it’s head out. I picked it up and put it on my lap. I then saw it was missing one leg. I pushed it off my lap and onto the floor. Then I said “Yuck, she’s gotta be kidding me”. I was so angry I hit the box off the table. It landed on the floor in front of the tv.  

I kept playing video games. The puppy started to roll around. Then it sat up and looked at me. It walked over and started to bark. I kicked it away it rolled and landed on its back. Then it saw a red ball under the wall unit. It stood up and tried to run off to get the ball but BANG! He crashed into the wall unit. He shook his head and grabbed the ball. I looked down and saw that he had rolled the ball over to my foot then he ran over. I kicked the ball into the box. He ran to get it but he fell over then he fell over in the box. He ran around in the box then he crashed into the set of drawers. He lifted the box off himself then started to bark at the box. He saw me laughing at him. He looked up and saw me looking at him. He picked up the ball and brought it over. He put the ball down in front of me. I picked up the ball and put it in my pocket.

I decided that I liked this puppy after all because he was funny and silly. I then grabbed my crutches and walked towards the door. Then I opened the door and shouted “Mum, we’ll be outside”. Then we went out. I thought he was going to be a good friend for life because he is missing one leg like me.